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Uncommon Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains - Week 5

Last time on ... UNCOMMON SURVIVOR; Coach cried because nobody liked him, Sears sponsored my favorite challenge to date, and Immunity Idol clues were discovered. One tempted Russell into danger with the Villains, while the other led to a discovery by Tom, who played it to help blindside Cirie. I like how blindside has become an official term, like, "grand slam," and, "hat trick."

Star-divide

Back in Herotown, fresh off the vote, J.T. is in PR-spin mode, telling everyone he did what he had to, for everyone else, the Merge is coming and she's not loyal after that. Rupert mad. Rupert very mad. The next morning, J.T. tries to regain Amanda's trust, but she's paranoid. She thinks he's made twenty alliances. That's not even possible, silly Amanda. 

The Villains greet the morning with some patent-pending Dragon Slayer Chi. Everyone starts to snicker when he begins to chant, as if that's the most ridiculous thing going on at the moment.

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep05_019_medium

While everyone stands around Coach in a circle, feeding him the attention he needs to survive, Russell is off looking for the Idol. He appears perplexed as he stands in a hole that he apparently dug. Sitting on the root of the tree, that's in the middle of this big hole he's dug, was the Idol. Russell picks it up, and here we go again.

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Reward Challenge Time! It's The Octagon! Fight for coconuts in the bottom, pass to your shooters, two shots win. No kicking the crap out of dudes like Ben did the first time they did this challenge. Winners get a chocolate feast. Jeff has some samples for everyone, and Colby and the Heroes turn their noses up at it.

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Jeff asks why this is, and Colby snaps back that he's ready to start the challenge. Jeff tells him that the Challenge starts when he's ready. Rupert says it's because they're focused, they don't care about the reward, only winning, but Russell replies that the Villains are always focused, that's why they win, which earns him a stare from Rupert.

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep05_060_medium

The Villains sit Parvati, Sandra, and Courtney, while the Heroes sit Colby. So much for focus and impatience to start the challenge. Next time, Colby, shut up and eat your candy. The match begins and the Heroes end up with all the coconuts. They make a few misses before James stumbles on a rebound and is slow to get up.

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When he does rise, he limps a couple steps and drops back down. Jeff calls for the medic. They look at James' leg, then he gets up to try to walk. He starts to walk normally, says he's fine, before you see pain shoot through him. Even Jeff winces. The medic lady pulls James from the challenge, and Jeff doesn't allow them to sub in Colby. The match begins again, and quickly Tom grabs two coconuts and tosses them back, while Russell gets the other. Each team misses one before Amanda sinks a point. They switch places next round, shooters in the pit, pitters in the shoot. Say that five times fast. The round starts and J.T. takes out jbox's fave (Boston Rob) with a leg tackle. The Heroes get two coconuts, but both miss. Tyson shoots and misses and the rebound falls to the ground where J.T. gets to it first, and is then carried over to the Villains' side by jbox's fave, who slams him into the wall. Russell reaches down to try and help, but the coconut is slipped out to Rupert, and Russell falls off the platform, who climbs back up.

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Both sides miss a few shots. J.T. starts assaulting Coach, picking him up and dropping him on his head.

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Tyson sinks a shot just as the camera catches Rupert swinging Jerri's face into a post, then yells at her that he didn't mean to do that.

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You should have eaten the chocolate, Rupert. Now it's haunting you. Jerri gets up and shakes it off with a, "whatever dude," and gets ready for the next round. She's like three times the man Coach is! The final round starts, Russell grabs two coconuts for the Villains, both shots miss. After several more misses, J.T. switches to defense, using his coconut to block jbox's fave's shot. Jbox's fave answers right back with a blocked shot. J.T. takes another shot that bounces in and out, but Jerri, her focus renewed by the earlier blow to the face, fires a perfect spiral that drops right in, sealing victory for the Villains. The Villains leave right away, and the Heroes sulk home, except for James, who has to stay and get checked; the plan being to put him in a splint and see if he can walk. 

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep05_141_medium

The Villains enjoy their chocolate feast and swim in a special cove. Everyone but Russell and Parvati talk loudly under an echoing rock formation about their assumption that Russell has the hidden Idol. Meanwhile, Russell's telling Parvati about the idol, and telling her he needs someone to help him work it. His plan is to turn Coach against jbox's fave. Russell takes Coach aside and floors him with knowledge of the idol. Coach is all about trust, and, "it's almost impossible for [him] to betray that trust." Then he kneels before him and Russell grants him knighthood. LARPing confirmed. 

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep05_171_medium

Over at Herotown, Amanda is sobbing because they lost the challenge, the reward was chocolate, and, oh yeah, James' knee. Applause to the editing crew who put J.T.'s, "I don't think James is comin' back," right after Amanda's, "I really hope I see him walk down the beach." Tom tells us he has his differences with James, and he doesn't want to root against him, but he'll do it silently anyway. It's Tom who spots James coming back first. Amanda runs out to him and hugs him.

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep05_190_medium

Everyone else greets him after. He says they don't know what's wrong with it, but that's because he needs an MRI, and to get one, he'd have to leave. So now he's going to lay around camp a couple days and let everyone take care of him. 

Immunity Challenge Time! Blind-folded Pairs Puzzle Retrieval and Assembly! Jerri calls the shots for the Villains and James calls for the Heroes. The challenge begins and all the Heroes walk into obstacles. Coach gets to a piece. Jbox's fave helps J.T. with a piece before Jerri calls him off it. Both tribes get three pieces back and return. There's a lot of stumbling and collisions. Jbox's fave runs right into a pair of Heroes carrying a piece. J.T. and Amanda lose each other, and the Villains get a piece ahead. James yells for everybody to shut up and stop. The Villains stay a piece ahead until the Heroes catch up to them at eight, then nine. With just a piece left for each, Rupert and Candice stumble over the piece and bring it in, crashing into Tom. They remove their blindfolds and start assembling. The Villains are still getting their last piece in, and don't get back until it looks like the Heroes are half done with theirs. But like magic, the Heroes immediately stop making any progress and the Villains make up all the time, finally completing their puzzle, winning yet another Tribal Immunity. 

The Heroes pout back at camp. Tom and Colby think the consensus is to vote for James, but Rupert tells J.T. they're getting rid of Tom. Candice thinks this is stupid. James hobbles over. Amanda meets with Rupert, who tells her that Candice was pushing for James to be gone, and she's probably the weakest. J.T. and Candice think the logical choice is to get rid of James. Then he swears to Rupert that he's voting for Tom, that they're together. Maybe he just means there, on the beach together, not voting together, because he's playing both sides against each other. 

Tribal Council Time! The big topic of discussion, of course, is James' knee. After James tries to blame Tom and Candice for talking too much during challenges and making them lose, Tom says it like it is, that anyone who wants James around is only doing it for his vote, not because he can compete. James seems to believe he can still outperform anyone, and tells everyone to vote for him if they don't think he can do it. With that, the voting starts.

Tom votes for James, adding, "All mass, no class," before dropping in his ballot. James, in turn, votes for Tom. Jeff eads two votes for Tom, then two for James. The next is Tom, and one more reads his name, sealing his fate. That was the dumbest vote ever. These are the worst Heroes ever.

Tom

Next time, it will be two weeks from now because March Madness has to come in and ruin everything. But when Survivor does return, Russell and jbox's fave threaten each other in the dark! See you then!

2 recs  |  Comment 33 comments |

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I remember when Rupert was the gleeful pirate...

and now he’s a woman-hitting idiot with no concept of Survivor strategy. I wish Jeff would rip him more.

J.T. is an idiot. Aligning yourself with a gimpy man? That’s the move you pick? These heroes have no brain…no wonder they can’t do a puzzle.

by TexansDC on Mar 12, 2010 11:32 AM EST reply actions  

Rupert might be the most annoying Survivor this season

He has no clue how to play the game.

Slamming Jerry’s face into a wooden post… this guy is a hero?

by jbox on Mar 12, 2010 1:10 PM EST up reply actions  

Then it seemed like he was mad at her. “How dare you make me do that to you!”

Isn't it enough to know that I ruined a pony making a gift for you? ◔ヮ◔
Uncommon Sportsman :: Absurdity in play

by Axion on Mar 12, 2010 1:51 PM EST up reply actions  

Typical Lifetime movie husband

“Why’d you make me hit you woman?!”

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Mar 12, 2010 2:17 PM EST up reply actions  

So true

JT made a dumb move. Who cares if you bust the old alliance? With Colby, Tom and Candice you have the numbers against them. And no matter what, the Rupert contingent isn’t going to trust JT anymore, so he’s basically on the bottom rung of the ladder.

James really has no class…calling Tom, “that guy”. Ridiculous

I was cracking up big time at the Dragon Slayer getting knighted..and how in awe he was to learn about the idol, even though a few minutes earlier, the entire tribe was talking about how he found it.

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Mar 12, 2010 12:16 PM EST reply actions  

You could just see his little Dragon Slayer heart melt.

Isn't it enough to know that I ruined a pony making a gift for you? ◔ヮ◔
Uncommon Sportsman :: Absurdity in play

by Axion on Mar 12, 2010 1:50 PM EST up reply actions  

his quote

about he will defend that honor for ever and ever or whatever he said, cracked me up too….and knowing that he will absolutely sell Russell out made it even funnier

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Mar 12, 2010 2:18 PM EST up reply actions  

James is an idiot

saying he can beat Probst in a race. If I was Tom I would have challenged him to some jumping jacks.

Is there any doubt that James is ’roided out?

by jbox on Mar 12, 2010 1:09 PM EST reply actions  

Screencaps

You need to get one of Amanda and Candice washing their giant clams

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Mar 12, 2010 2:19 PM EST reply actions   3 recs

I’ve been stealing ss’s from another site cuz it’s faster. Don’t tell anyone.

Here it is:

Isn't it enough to know that I ruined a pony making a gift for you? ◔ヮ◔
Uncommon Sportsman :: Absurdity in play

by Axion on Mar 12, 2010 7:50 PM EST up reply actions   1 recs

The whole Heroes alliance war is dumb

They should be voting off people that are either weak or will flip after the merge. Hello Candice!

I don’t get why James, Amanda, Tom, Colby and J.T. can’t be an alliance together. They are all loyal and strong and would be a good team post-merge. Why Cirie or Rupert or Candice are even involved at all is beyond me.

And, I know James is limping, but post-merge that’s probably a good thing for those in his alliance. Maybe.

I just don’t get where the Heroes end game is. Let’s just assume that right now they go into the merge not losing another challenge. There will be a foursome of James, Rupert, J.T. and Amanda. Then you’ll have two wild cards in Colby and Candice. Then you’ll have the left over villains. Those aren’t good numbers. In all likelihood they’ll lose either Colby or Candice or both, so I guess it doesn’t matter.

No, I don't think you're an idiot. Please don't go trying to prove me wrong.

Bolts from the Blue - General Manager: It is what it isn't

by Wonko on Mar 12, 2010 2:23 PM EST reply actions  

is there any doubt colby is next off the hero's team or that russell will get boston rob of the villians team

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 12, 2010 5:03 PM EST up reply actions  

The only move that Colby has to stave off being voted off...

Going Tonya Harding on James’s knee…and I would totally call him a hero if he did that.

by TexansDC on Mar 12, 2010 5:21 PM EST up reply actions  

better yet let him be sneaky about it and do something at night like put a rock near .....

wear he is sleeping to see if he trips over it.

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 12, 2010 5:24 PM EST up reply actions  

Nah

His move to save himself one more time is pledge loyalty and sell out Candice as someone who will flip.

No, I don't think you're an idiot. Please don't go trying to prove me wrong.

Bolts from the Blue - General Manager: It is what it isn't

by Wonko on Mar 12, 2010 8:11 PM EST up reply actions  

Well, yeah...

That’s the smart way. I just want James out

by TexansDC on Mar 13, 2010 12:09 AM EST up reply actions  

I feel like the Heroes tribe splintered and I don’t know how. There’s a lot of irrational hate for Tom, Colby, and Stephenie that I just don’t understand. None of their votes make sense.

I’d put money on a all Villains final 4 right now…there’s just no reason for me to believe the Heroes get far in this game.

by TexansDC on Mar 12, 2010 5:20 PM EST up reply actions  

i think russell has this. he brings parvati with him to the finals and since she already won......

they would give (gets the most votes for the win in finale)russell the million dollars. plus everyone would see parvati rode russell’s coat-tails.

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 12, 2010 5:26 PM EST up reply actions  

It depends if they do final 2 or final 3...

but I could see that happening. No one likes Parvati.

by TexansDC on Mar 12, 2010 5:42 PM EST up reply actions  

russell is smart. remember when he got beat by the lady in his last finale.

he knew she would get votes and was trying to get into her mind(he obviously failed). the other person (a guy) he knew had no chance of beating him and he got no votes if i remember correctly. so wh would be the third. maybe the spanish lady b/c she also won her survivor outing.

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 12, 2010 6:22 PM EST up reply actions  

I think if Russell won this

he wouldn’t have been crying at the reunion show for the last season.

by jbox on Mar 12, 2010 7:43 PM EST up reply actions  

Parvati is smart too

She doesn’t want to go to the final against Russell.

No, I don't think you're an idiot. Please don't go trying to prove me wrong.

Bolts from the Blue - General Manager: It is what it isn't

by Wonko on Mar 12, 2010 8:10 PM EST up reply actions  

there is no way a former winner will win imo. just like in the all-star game the former winners.......

fell like dominoes.

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 13, 2010 1:20 PM EST up reply actions  

What if Parvati can somehow take Sandra to the final 2?

Of course if there is a final 3 then somehow JT or Colby would have to be involved and that’s hard to imagine.

No, I don't think you're an idiot. Please don't go trying to prove me wrong.

Bolts from the Blue - General Manager: It is what it isn't

by Wonko on Mar 13, 2010 1:24 PM EST up reply actions  

no chance that happens. colby is next one off the hero tribe.

sandra has gained alot of weight. the only way she makes it far into the jury is if she can do a puzzle. can’t remeber if she was good at them. at this point russel or amanda can win this. why b/c they both finished in second place and she has james as a ally and if it gets here farther in the game parvati will join them. that works both ways. russell is just clever and finds immunity idols.

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 13, 2010 1:32 PM EST up reply actions  

you are making a lot of assumptions about a game where almost nothing goes the way anyone assumes it will.

No, I don't think you're an idiot. Please don't go trying to prove me wrong.

Bolts from the Blue - General Manager: It is what it isn't

by Wonko on Mar 13, 2010 7:58 PM EST up reply actions  

these are just my opinions and are meant to be taken as only my opinions.

this season has been great so far and i look forward to seeing who wins. your right nothing usually goes as planned but i’m 96% sure a former winner will not win. peace.

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 15, 2010 2:26 PM EDT up reply actions  

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Mar 15, 2010 3:33 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

go back and watch revenge of the nerds. all three or four of them.

nice pic but my hair and beard are longer. long live survivor.

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 15, 2010 3:55 PM EDT up reply actions  

I was backing you up wolfman

not making fun

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Mar 15, 2010 4:53 PM EDT up reply actions  

sorry i'm used to people going against me in college football and mma

sorry about that

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 16, 2010 3:25 PM EDT up reply actions  

If a Hero makes it to the final 2 or 3…I will be stunned. That tribe shows no concept of knowing how to play Survivor.

by TexansDC on Mar 13, 2010 7:00 PM EST up reply actions  

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