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Uncommon Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains - Week 4

Previously on... UNCOMMON SURVIVOR; The Heroes doled out a beating to the Villains to win their first Immunity Challenge. James completed his transformation into an angry beast with Rupert not far behind. Parvati became the girl everyone loves to hate and Randy was sent home before Pooh and friends could find his tail and nail it back on.

Star-divide

When the Villains return to camp following their dismissal of Randy, Sandra's comments about Coach have the Dragon Slayer fighting back tears. He shares his heart while Tyson holds him in his arms, nodding, telling him it's okay. Coach breaks down and Tyson stares into his eyes, and before long, embraces him again. He tells Coach that he can coach him on what to do. This interests the Dragon Slayer. Tyson dons his white suit of armor and explains that Coach should no longer tell his stories, that people don't believe him and they mock him. This depresses Coach further and he threatens to leave that night. "I'm done," he says.

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep04_007_medium

The next morning, he explains to a concerned crowd of none that he will be taking a walk. Tyson tells everyone that Coach cried on his shoulder last night. When reached for comment, jbox's fave (Boston Rob) had this to say: "Coach hadda sob session wit' Tyson... I dunno, dat's nawt muchuva coach ify'ask me." He goes after Coach to give him a pep talk. Coach tells jbox's fave that now that they're in middle school, they never hang out as much anymore. Jbox's fave is too much of a Bro to be having too much of this, giving Coach a big Bro hug and a Bro fist, telling him it'll be okay, that he has to trust him, and to pick his head up and act like a man. Then we are treated to Coach's version of Daily Affirmations and shown scenes of him showing off his tribal armband tattoos he got when he spent time with the Barbed Wire tribe of Papua New Guinea. Tyson, do you see what you almost ruined?

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep04_029_medium

Morning 9 greets the Heroes of Herotown, and they've got tree mail, and oh-em-gee, ladies, it's a Sears catalog! The Reward Challenge is littered with enough Sears merchandise to bring Bob Vila to his knees. The challenge is head-to-head slippery basketball. Jeff calls the catalog, "circular," which I find strange, but I was never good in geometry. Jeff then shows off the array of products available, telling us that the Heroes picked fishing gear and cooking supplies, while the Villains selected a tool kit and tarp with rope. Parvati sits out, and did I mention that this challenge is sponsored by Sears, where you can spend your life well. 

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep04_037_medium

Coach and Tom face off in the first round. Is everyone oiled up? Both men slide out to grab the number 14 ball. Tom, whose chest is smoother than Coach's, slides directly to the ball, while Coach has to scramble to get there. They get to their baskets and both shoot twice, with Coach scoring the first point. Next, Russell and Cirie go. Well, Russell goes, sliding all the way to the ball and getting up to walk gingerly over to his basket while Cirie crawls on her hands and knees to her ball after sliding nowhere. Russell scores on his second attempt before Cirie even has a chance. Next, a coat rack versus a flag pole. No, wait, that's Courtney and Candice. They slide out to their ball, but Candice's speed gets her there first. She gets caught in the ropes like a sick dolphin, flinging the ropes around to escape. This confuses Courtney, who shrugs her shoulders while Candice scores the Heroes' first goal.

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep04_079_medium

Next up is Amanda and Jerri; Amanda gets her ball and to her basket before Jerri, but the bitter old cougar remains calm and collected, scoring on her first shot, then erupting into an Elaine Benes victory dance. Up next is Sandra versus James. This round goes much like Russell vs. Cirie, with Sandra crawling feebly while James makes easy work of the course. Danielle and Rupert go next, and Danielle is definitely oiled up.

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep04_099_medium

They both fumble the ball everywhere before Rupert scores, tying the game up for the final round. Last, it's Tyson vs. Colby. Colby gets his ball first and takes his first shot, bouncing it off the rim. Tyson, not far behind, bounces his shot off the rim as well.

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep04_105_medium

Both exchange misses until Tyson finally sinks a shot, securing victory and valuable merchandise for the Villains. 

The Villains return to camp with their bounty, while Coach informs us of his change of heart, now that his team's won a challenge. While discovering their new toys, Russell drops a clue in the form of a rolled up piece of parchment from a knife sheath he's holding. Jbox's fave picks it up and reads it to everyone. It has detailed directions on how to find the idol. They openly discuss stupid ideas about what to do with the idol while Russell salivates about his Precioussss in the background. Jbox's fave tells Coach they should start building a shelter and Russell can't just leave the idol sitting there. In a moment of conspicuous stupidness, Russell announces that he's going for a walk. This alerts everyone, and jbox's fave tells Sandra to go see what he's doing. She sneaks down after him, and he steps out to see if they are looking for him, which lets her see him. She runs back to report, and jbox's fave orders that he be gone. Coach seemed to have no idea what the implications of an Immunity Idol were. 

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep04_142_medium

Morning 10 in Herotown starts with a cup of coffee, and another clue hidden in their coffee beans. The clue also has detailed directions to a hidden idol on their camp. After J.T. reads it, everyone stands around stunned. Before too long, J.T. is off one way while James saunters off in the opposite direction. Maybe the directions weren't so detailed. Tom and Amanda start off after James, arriving at where Tom thinks is the right location. He starts to dig with Amanda next to him, and James comes over, digging on the other side. Quickly, Tom discovers the idol and slips it into his sock before anyone notices. Anyone, that is, except Amanda. She notices him acting strange and saw him slip it into his sock. She tells Candice, then J.T., who tells Cirie. Tom meets up with Colby to tell him the news. Colby thinks they are back in the game. 

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep04_168_medium

Immunity Challenge Time! Blind-folded Survivor-ball with a maze at the end! This is the one that killed Dread Russell last season. Jeff informs us that it's the only challenge never to be completed. His trivia sounds better. The Villains sit out Courtney and Sandra, the Heroes sit out Cirie. Jbox's fave and Tom are the ball riders. Coach and Tyson guide the ball to the end efficiently and get jbox's fave to work on calling the shots for the maze. James and Rupert spend a lot of time in the rough before they get Tom to where he needs to be. Both men guide their maze-persons like something I can't believe.

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep04_195_medium

Some impressive calls and daring moves get them both close to the end, each ball rolling on the edge of the cup before the Villains can sink it for the win. The Heroes wear sad faces once more.

This is one of my favorite parts of the game, where the dangerous players are identified, and then left in the game to wreak havoc. Cirie and Candice want to get rid of the Tom/Colby thing. They plan to split the vote, three-three, so Tom plays the idol and one of them goes home, at least. Amanda asks J.T. what he thinks, and he says Tom isn't going to hurt them. J.T. wants to get rid of Candice, she can't be trusted. Tom meets before Princess Amanda's court, resting his case on trust, and she finds favor in him when he boldly offers her the idol.

Survivor_heroesvsvillains_ep04_214_medium

Amanda goes to tell Queen Cirie, who is immediately caught up in hysterics over this change in decision. She has a tantrum that draws over James and Rupert. J.T. also overhears this, and goes to tell Colby and Tom. They plan to assassinate the Queen with the help of J.T.'s vote. 

Voting Time! Everyone takes a seat before Jeff begins his interrogation. Early alliances will send great players home early. Rupert would rather stick to his word than win challenges, and when he says it sucks, Jeff rubs his face in it. Jeff asks everyone how concerned they are about going home tonight. Colby articulates his worry the best, probably because his is the only authentic feeling of any of them. J.T. is honest about not being worried, though, he says he trusts his alliance, it's what got him there. His ambiguous phrasing makes Colby wince. Rupert kicks off the voting.

Candice votes for Tom, but thinks he's a great guy. Tom votes Cirie and compliments her dainty fingers. J.T. is shown writing a C because the producers are a bunch of teases. Before Jeff begins to read the votes, Tom plays his Immunity Idol. No votes count for Tom now. Candice's vote is read first, and it's invalidated. The second and third votes are also for Tom, still invalid. The fourth vote is for Colby, the first vote that counts! The next vote reads, "Coby," and somehow that counts against Colby. The next vote is for Cirie, then another. It's tied, 2-2! The final vote reads Cirie, and the Queen is beheaded! A stunning upset! Rupert can only shake his head. James is confused by the whole thing. 

Cirie20_medium

via wwwimage.cbs.com

Next time, jbox's fave hunts Russell, Candice wants to seek shelter with Colby and Tom now, and it appears that the challenge that got Ben eliminated due to a violent kick make a return with a medical emergency. 

3 recs  |  Comment 26 comments |

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My favorite quote, because it's so true

Coach tells jbox’s fave that now that they’re in middle school, they never hang out as much anymore.

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Mar 5, 2010 10:38 AM EST reply actions  

Rob's pep talk to Coach

 It was just a few episodes ago that Rob was crying like a bitch and now he’s telling Coach to act like a man?

by jbox on Mar 5, 2010 11:40 AM EST up reply actions  

But Rob was sick

he didn’t just get his feelings hurt.

I enjoyed Rob’s pep talk

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Mar 5, 2010 1:09 PM EST up reply actions  

Great episode though

I didn’t really think Cirie was going to get voted off because the producers tend to show you a little conspiracy when the obvious vote is coming to throw you off the scent. I thought this was one of those times, but was happy when they finally voted off someone that is definitely a threat.

I can’t understand James either as he keeps saying he wants to win and wants to keep the strongest…yet he keeps an overweight woman around. Totally confused by that James.

The oil challenge should be mandatory like the mud wrestling. Those boobs looked amazing. Amanda’s droopers. Danielle’s balloons. They just needed more frontal diving/sliding shots for maximum boobage.

Boobs

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Mar 5, 2010 10:41 AM EST reply actions  

That was a good challenge

I thought Jeff should have said the number as he said “go”, so that they didn’t necessarily know what they were sliding at, at the start. I think I would have shot the basket over hand.

by jbox on Mar 5, 2010 11:39 AM EST up reply actions  

No way

Screw Amanda’s boobs. Danielle’s boob are amazing and I LOVE them.

I also veto your vote for mud wrestling. I say lets keep the oil because the mud only covers up the marvelous-ness of Danielle’s boobs.

by Nikkikkippi on Mar 5, 2010 6:05 PM EST up reply actions   1 recs

Did you just tell us to screw Amanda's boobs?

I’m not going to disparage anyone’s oily goodness. I’ll even say I enjoyed James’ oiled up bod.

I'm the first person to admit that I'm wrong about a lot of things, but I'm going to be the last person to admit I'm wrong about what we're currently talking about.

Bolts from the Blue - General Manager: It is what it isn't

by Wonko on Mar 8, 2010 1:56 AM EST up reply actions  

Had the competition on slo mo while I read this post

After seeing Amanda’s performance I thought that couldn’t be topped. There was a lot of bounce, a lot of give on the slide, and then a nice wedgie on the approach to the toss. But, Danielle’s stood up well. The fakies had some nice bounce and I totally missed the slippage and blurring in regular time. She had ample wedgie in her tutu bikini bottom and she also fumbled it around so it gave her more camera time.

God, that sounded pervey, but it needed to be said. All angles must be covered. This is serious uncommon sportsman business.

I'm the first person to admit that I'm wrong about a lot of things, but I'm going to be the last person to admit I'm wrong about what we're currently talking about.

Bolts from the Blue - General Manager: It is what it isn't

by Wonko on Mar 8, 2010 2:09 AM EST up reply actions   1 recs

Russell

Is playing a sloppy game (at least what we see). It’s like he hasn’t adjusted from playing with the dimwits

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Mar 5, 2010 10:44 AM EST reply actions  

Russell is being sloppy

Why not just sneak away at night or another time without announcing it to everyone?

by jbox on Mar 5, 2010 11:38 AM EST up reply actions  

I hate Rupert

all that guy cares about is bonding. Get your head in the game! Loved Jeff just making him look stupid in Tribal council. I think if I were Tom or Colby, I’d just openly try to sway Rupert right then and there.

by jbox on Mar 5, 2010 11:38 AM EST reply actions  

I marked out when Jeff made him look stupid.

I loved the pirate, but he comes off awful in the All-Star editions. He wants to bond, James wants to win….yet they both backed the overweight woman who was playing people off each other…dumb. That’s why I could care less about the heroes.

by TexansDC on Mar 5, 2010 1:29 PM EST up reply actions  

2nd thoughts

Russell needs to play smarter, everyone knows everyone’s game here.

I vote Rupert most likely to eat another Survivor as part of a bonding experience. Courtney is second because she needs to eat.

Jeff was a little surly in tribal council. I liked it.

Blindside on Cirie, great. Colby and J.T.‘s faces during interrogation, greater. Everyone’s face after Cirie’s gone? Greatest.

The challenge screenshots were strategically selected to allow worksafe viewing. Courtney looks like she’s spanking Candice, btw.

Isn't it enough to know that I ruined a pony making a gift for you? ◔ヮ◔
Uncommon Sportsman :: Absurdity in play

by Axion on Mar 5, 2010 1:34 PM EST reply actions  

"Everyone knows everyone's game here."

Not true in Russell’s case. They filmed Samoa and HvV back-to-back. No one really saw his game.

In pre-season hype for HvV, Jerri said something to the effect of if they had seen Russell’s season that he’d have been off first.

by TexansDC on Mar 5, 2010 3:55 PM EST up reply actions  

That is true

I suppose he has that advantage, but he’s definitely forgetting these people have played before.

Isn't it enough to know that I ruined a pony making a gift for you? ◔ヮ◔
Uncommon Sportsman :: Absurdity in play

by Axion on Mar 5, 2010 4:57 PM EST up reply actions  

Mmhmm

If he’s the fan he claimed to be…and the Survivor he claimed to be…he really should be able to run circles around these people.

by TexansDC on Mar 6, 2010 9:27 PM EST up reply actions  

What did Coach do that made him a villian?

I could just as easily see him on the hero team.

by jbox on Mar 5, 2010 1:36 PM EST reply actions  

dragon slayers are villians in todays world. i like my dragons.

i have confidence russell will outmanuever boston rob especially know that someone important has said boston rob has the best ability to win this. they always set you up for the fall in this game.

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 5, 2010 1:55 PM EST up reply actions  

I guess

Because he backstabbed his original tribe to go with JT and because he spins yarns.

I'm the first person to admit that I'm wrong about a lot of things, but I'm going to be the last person to admit I'm wrong about what we're currently talking about.

Bolts from the Blue - General Manager: It is what it isn't

by Wonko on Mar 8, 2010 1:58 AM EST up reply actions  

Version 1.1

Now without less grammatical errors.

Isn't it enough to know that I ruined a pony making a gift for you? ◔ヮ◔
Uncommon Sportsman :: Absurdity in play

by Axion on Mar 5, 2010 6:01 PM EST reply actions  

Found these fun gifs on another site


Isn't it enough to know that I ruined a pony making a gift for you? ◔ヮ◔
Uncommon Sportsman :: Absurdity in play

by Axion on Mar 5, 2010 6:39 PM EST reply actions   1 recs

has jeff probst signed on to do more survivors?

i once heard parvati s. on another entertainment show that she thought probst was high and mighty and did not like him. he does not come across that way but you have tv personalities and then behind the scenes personalities that don’t make it onto the show. i wonder what his real life persona is?

I'm all about covering the spread and moneylines. I was building a house, I don't deserve this, deserves have nothing to do with it. Bang. "Unforgiven" I drink your milkshake. I drink it up! "There Will BE Blood"

by wolfmanshowlforever on Mar 5, 2010 7:33 PM EST up reply actions  

Jeff was on fire for this Tribal Council

I just wanna re-watch him pointing out Rupert’s horrible, illogical move again and again…

by TexansDC on Mar 6, 2010 9:28 PM EST up reply actions  

The Probst facial expression machine was definitely in full force

Maybe the emmies have have gone to his head.

I'm the first person to admit that I'm wrong about a lot of things, but I'm going to be the last person to admit I'm wrong about what we're currently talking about.

Bolts from the Blue - General Manager: It is what it isn't

by Wonko on Mar 8, 2010 2:01 AM EST up reply actions  

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